Moonage Webdream

For this via my buds at Independent Sources ( via Wiki ).  It’s just some quotes of Jean Claude Van Damme is all:

• “You need a flash when you photograph a rabbit that already has red eyes.”

• “If you work with a jackhammer during an earthquake, stop, otherwise you are working for nothing.”

• “According to statistics, one person out of five is disturbed. If there are four people around you who seem normal, that’s not good.”

• “If you phone a psychic and she doesn’t answer the phone before it rings, hang up.”

• “In the year 3,000, people are going to speak with sound waves. Don’t think I’m crazy, the whales do it. Dolphins too.”

• “A cow eats three acres. With three acres I could make two thousand kilos of rice. With three acres I could feed Avignon!”

• “My wife is not my best sexual partner, but she’s good with the housework.” ( He’s now been married four times, not sure which wife was so good with the housework. )

• “A cookie has no soul, it’s just a cookie. But before it was milk and eggs. And in eggs there’s the potential for life.” ( Think REAL HARD about this one! )

• “Showing myself nude from behind doesn’t pose any problems but from the front that’s another story. I don’t want to lose all my fans!”

• “I’m fast, why? Because I eat vegetables.”

• “Obviously I’ve taken drugs.”

• “When I walk across my living room from my chiminey to my window, it takes me ten seconds, but for a bird it takes one second, and for oxygen zero seconds!”

• “I am fascinated by air. If you remove the air from the sky, all the birds would fall to the ground. And all the planes, too.”

• “Air is beautiful, yet you cannot see it. It’s soft, yet you cannot touch it. Air is a little like my brain.”

I really, really, really, never pondered just how deep Jean Claude was.  For that, I truly feel at this time my life has not been all that it could be.  Now, thanks to Independent Sources and Wiki, I feel much better about myself!

However, my life apparently could be even more complete, this page has even MORE JC quotables.  However, they are all in French.  And, my French sucks.  If anyone wants to take a stab at it, please DO make me aware.