Moonage Webdream

Looking at things that probably don’t need to be looked at

Archive for September, 2005

Sep-30-05

Curing Kate Moss’s sexual orientation?

posted by Moonage

A model doing coke?

This is just TOO good.  The story starts out innocently enough, a model gets caught doing cocaine.  OK.  I’m SOOO shocked.  But, then, it gets boring, the coked up model loses modeling jobs because of her habit ( Earth to advertisers, how many do you REALLY think are NOT doing coke? )  But, thanks to the imagination of the UK’s Daily Mail, it gets better:

As well as treatment for her cocaine problem, Miss Moss is expected to receive counselling for sex addiction.

She is reported to have had lesbian affairs with her friends Sadie Frost and Davinia Taylor as well as three-in-a-bed sex sessions.

Now, we’re getting somewhere.  I did a post a while back on Jane Fonda supposedly in sort of the same boat.  She had a problem with her sexual orientation at the time.  However, the people involved in the trysts weren’t very appealing, and, to say the least, the personalities even less so.  She apparently cured her sexual orientation.  So, given that caution, I decided to check into this one a little deeper.

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This is Davinia Taylor.  I know absolutely nothing about her. Looks pretty good tho.

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This is Sadie Frost in how I would picture her during a coke binge.  Not too awful bad.  The esthetics here are certainly more pleasing than Jane Fonda.  Now, to the meat, or lack thereof, of the matter.

As well as treatment for her cocaine problem, Miss Moss is expected to receive counselling for sex addiction.

She is reported to have had lesbian affairs with her friends Sadie Frost and Davinia Taylor as well as three-in-a-bed sex sessions

  • She is “expected”?  Doesn’t sound like a lot of hardcore evidence there. 
  • Does one really get counseling for having lesbian affairs?  Last I was told, that’s a sexual orientation thing.  It’s natural.
  • Why bother?  I mean, she’s scoring top of the line chicks here.  If she was doing a Hugh Grant thing with ugly prostitutes, I’d be more inclined to go along with it.

Now, those are the babes in her life.  THIS, is the man in her life:

Born: 12-Mar-1979
Birthplace: Hexham, Northumberland, England
Gender: Male
Ethnicity: White
Sexual orientation: Bisexual
Occupation: Musician

Level of fame: Somewhat
Executive summary: Ex-frontman for The Libertines

Father: Peter
Mother: Jacqueline
Girlfriend: Kate Moss

I don’t think she needs any counseling for the “sex addiction”.  I think that will cure itself when the drug addiction is rectified.  I also don’t think she’ll be quite so interested in women once she’s been with a slightly more masculine male.  Or, vice versa.

I did come to one bottom conclusion from reading the whole sordid story in both the Daily Mail and The Mirror.

This is paybacks for her lawsuit against the Brit tabloids..

I still want to see the video tho.  And Kate, you go girl!  I mean that.

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Sep-27-05

Dr. Unheimlich’s Disease Registry

posted by Moonage

And yet another mindless contribution from kevan.org, the Dr. Unheimlich’s Disease Registry.  Create your own illness and name it after yourself.  Pretty cool if you ask me.

Doctor Unheimlich has diagnosed me with
Moonage Webdream’s Lurgy
Cause: watching too much television
Symptoms: seeing dead people, peeling skin, sneezing, hearing voices
Cure: psychiatry

Enter your name, for your own diagnosis:

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Sep-27-05

My Spammer Name

posted by Moonage

Continuing my quest to provide meaningless contributions of the internet to modern society, I give you the Spammer Name Generator. Just enter your name and it spits out a totally inane name that would fit any spam letter flawlessly!

My spammer name is Anselm U. Reactant.

Enter your name to get yours:

Kudos to JTR for the lead.

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Sep-22-05

Those Cwazy Gambians

posted by Moonage
Sep-21-05

Jet Blue 292

posted by Moonage

I just watched the entire broadcast of the Jet Blue 292 emergency landing.  It was cool as hell!

The pilots of that plane are truly heroes, just for one day.

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Sep-21-05

Dwight D. Eisenhower

posted by Moonage



This article was written by Michael before the US-Iraqi war began.  It
is just as pertinent today as it was then. You know who Dwight David Eisenhower
was.  I’ll just let the interview take over.

MichaelRead: “Sir, I think there is only
one subject to discuss: war or not? I’d also like your view on the
ramifications of either, please.”

President Eisenhower: “You fight a war to end what is yet also to prevent what maybe. Which would prove the most costly?
If it is removing an unpopular head of state that has little of no power outside his fiefdom then it is costly to war. Yet if this same head of state
has ambitions beyond his own land and it is greatly believed these ambitions would unsettle the balances achieved – no matter how fragile – then war has a
reason to its cost since the cost of his ambitions exceed that of the cost of war. So your question ‘war or not’ has to take this into consideration.”

MR: “Agreed, sir, yet how do we know for
sure that Saddam Hussein has designs on extra-territorial control? Yes, he did
invade Kuwait claiming it was Iraqi territory yet he was beaten back. Should not that be also
taken into consideration?”

PE: “Beaten back, sure. And by a superior
force. What is he builds by whatever means a superior force? I have a question:
how do his neighboring countries interact with him?”

MR: “I see your point, sir. They are
wary. Yet, my point: war because of what he might do?”

PE: “Let me emphasize
my point. Wars are fought to prevent what may happen. World
War II began because the threat was the enslavement of Europe. Hitler wanted Europe. Simple fact. Winston
Churchill fought against this. And let me underline that Hitler had said in his
writing and his speeches this was his aim. What has Saddam said are his
intentions? Don’t forget at one time Hitler’s aims were thought of as coming
from a madman.”

MR: “Are you saying, sir, that because of
what Saddam Hussein may do based on what he has done and has said his
intentions justifies a war? That there will be a war?”

PE: No, I don’t say there has to be a war
yet I do say that a war now will be a preferable alternative to finding out
later that by waiting the consequences are worse than a war now.”

MR: “Sir, if we do have a war then
Hussein will never achieve and we won’t know what he may have done. It seems so
speculative.”

PE: “And how many more unfortunates would
have gone up Hitler’s chimneys if the war had not been won? Your use of the
word ‘speculative’ is a poor choice because you’re implying there’s an
alternative embedded in Hussein’s mind beyond what he has expressed. Do you
think that he will be visited by the Ghosts of Christmas and then undergo a
conversion into a western-based democracy?”

MR:. “No, sir, I doubt that highly. Yet
what if there is a coup and Hussein is overthrown by his own people? Surely
that’s better than a war?”

PE: “Then, Mr. Read, that
would be a war. Yet think on this: what if after all the
repression Hussein has placed on his people and the misery he has caused has
not yet caused revolt. What if the Iraqi people don’t have the means to revolt
even though they may wish to? Which brings me to my next question of you: would
the forces going into Iraq be welcomed as liberators or what? I have to ask that question because it was
also asked of Afghanistan and you know the answer there.”

MR: “I wish we could continue this.
However, Mr. President, I do not have the space. As is the custom on
The Interview That Never Was, you have the last word.

PE: “Would that the other alternative to
war is peace when more often than not it is the continuance of a tyranny. War
is not to be entered lightly yet it has often been the only route preventing
something worse than war: enslavement of a people. It is said the winners of
war write the history yet is there one thinking person who doesn’t believe that
the war to rid the world of Hitler was a wasted war? If Hitler had won do you
think he would have ceased his ethnic cleansing?

“What you have to answer is the question of Hussein becoming
more powerful across time and what would he then do when he had the power? If
you think he would take this power and use it against his foes then a war now
becomes imperative.

“Does this make me a warhawk, Mr. Read? I have seen war. It
is despicable. Good men die. War is so terrible that every means should be done
to prevent it. Every means. Yet, if the choice is war against a probability
that evil will become stronger then war is a necessity.

“Realize, Mr. Read, the US is not territorially inclined.
Yes, it wishes its political power to expand but even this political power is
not based on conquering and then putting in US administration. In Afghanistan the Afghanis are in control. Yes, this regime is more amicable to the west than
the regime it replaced, yet it is not a puppet government. Why would then Iraq be different? We won World War II yet our enemies then are in control of their
own countries now. Why would Iraq be different?

“War? Inevitable? Hussein invites war. Why? Let me say this
one last time: if Hussein gathers power he will use it to his already stated
aims. You may think he’s ranting and he is a madman but too often in the past
we have found that madmen as he meant every word he said.”

MR: “Thank you, Mr. President. May we
continue this discussion in May?”

MichaelR

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Sep-21-05

Clinton/Lewinsky Condoms

posted by Moonage

A  new line of condoms is grabbing headlines in China even as its sparks a debate about trademark law and promotion campaigns. The products’ brand names: "Clinton" and "Lewinsky."

The condoms are sold in boxes of 12, with the brand named after former President Bill Clinton priced at $3.70 and that of former White House intern Monica Lewinsky at $2.25……

"We chose the name because we think Clinton is a symbol of success and a man of responsibility. And Lewinsky is a woman who dares to love and dares to hate," said Liu Wenhua, the company’s general manager…..

"We haven’t told Clinton about this yet, but maybe you could help us find him," Liu added. "We’d like to tell him how respected he is in China, so we can boost his confidence and help his career."

I am NOT making this stuff up!

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Sep-13-05

The Beatles

posted by Moonage

I finally got around to sticking some of my Beatles remakes on my music server:

Now, I’ve been complaining about music today.  Name one band that sounds anything like those remakes.  That’s what music should be sounding like today.  It’s fairly easy for me to throw together these tunes.  Think about this, when every single one of these songs were done originally, there were no computers.  There were synthesizers.  Now, if you can fathom this, there weren’t even distortion boxes.  They weren’t able to computerize voices to make them sound better.  Until The Beatles did basically these songs originally, bands just walked in to a recording studio, played their parts, often together, and left.  That was it.  The Beatles were pretty much the pioneers of spending recording time individually to perfect the sound each individual wanted.  Secondly, for you grunge fans, The White Album IMO is the very first grunge album.  After setting recording standards so high very few bands could achieve, The Beatles stripped it all down to the roots with The White Album.  It had no cover picture.  It didn’t even mention who the band was ( on the original print ).  And, most of the songs made little to no sense.  They were silly inane songs that had no message for the most part.  For you hard rock fans, Helter Skelter is what started it all.  No if’s, and’s, or but’s. Don’t even try to debate that one.  If you think you have the urge, just remember, your grandparents were freaking out to The White Album.

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Sep-12-05

A new music trend?

posted by Moonage

I have been downloading songs for the little girl.  She’s 12.  I had to delete several songs she "likes" because of the title alone.  Not appropriate for a 12 year old.  I’m not even concerned about the content, if I can’t get past the title, it’s dust.  I listened to a few of them.  They are either "grunge" that is not real grunge, rap with bad lyrics and no music, or pop.  That’s it.

This weekend there was a local shoutfest.  Now, for those not familiar, shoutfests are where kids and adults play contemporary music with Christian themes.  They have become hugely popular here in the last few years.

I think I know why, and it’s not the answer you might think.  It’s not the Christian right programming impressionable youths.  It’s not parents threatening their kids to be Christian or no Playstation.  It’s a little deeper than that.

It’s because Christian music is about the only music with an underlying cause any more.

Now, I’ve bemoaned the state of popular music here before.  It bores me senseless.  It’s the same thing regurgitated exactly the same way in slightly modified packages to appeal to slightly varying tastes in music.  That’s all.  Rappers don’t care about the music, they care about saying what they wanna say.  Most of it’s stereotypical BS.  Grunge bands aren’t doing what grunge bands used to do, getting the most out of their sound.  They’re doing the very best they can to emulate Nirvana.  That’s it.  Telling the difference between Lou Reed, Iggy Pop, and The Ramones was very easy.  They all had their own interpretation of music.  Telling the difference between today’s performers takes a lot more effort.  Hard rock bands like Korn all do exactly the same thing.  The thing that impresses kids the most about Korn is their ability to spew profanity and "rage" against everything they can dream about.  Honestly, they don’t have a clue that they are making this stuff up as they go.  Hard rock is all about growling profanities and unimaginably distorted guitars.

Bottom line, there is no motivation other than selling records.  What motivation there is is purely financially driven.  That shallowness is what leaves the door open for bands that are singing about something they sincerely care about.  When you do that, your music, no matter the style, reflects that dedication and sincerity.  When I was younger, the music was the motivation and dedication.  People didn’t worry too much about style or mastering any genre.  In the lack thereof, something with a cause is filling that void.

I think it’s a shame that more kids don’t listen to some of the newer Christian ( insert any religion you want ) popular bands, for no other reason than to learn that unless you are truly dedicated to what you are creating the music for, you may get lucky once or twice, but you won’t be satisfied with your art.  Maybe that’s why so many bands today sounds so frustrated.  If you’re not religious, and wanna be a musician, don’t sell out for you’re seeing today.  Dedicate yourself to music.  Sing about things that truly mean something to you.  Sing about things that affect other things but yourself.  And most importantly, always, always, always, try to expand your musical world.  So many bands today are parodies of themselves within a year after making it.  I can’t imagine having to sing some of Korn’s songs for 20 years.  I mean, how long can you truly be mad at your father when he gave you an allowance well into your 20’s?

Sing about something real that means something to you and after 20 years you’ll still be proud to sing it.

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Sep-11-05

NFL In Chaos?

posted by Moonage

You know something’s not quite right when you see this:

Bengals 1 0 0 1.000
Steelers 1 0 0 1.000
Browns 0 1 0 .000
Ravens 0 0 0 -

I have discussed solar flares.  Yeah, that’s the story I’m sticking with.

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